One of the main problems of OCPD in marriage partners is a sense of misplaced priorities. For example, a person with OCPD may show excessive devotion to work, to the exclusion of family time and other relationships. A spouse can often feel ignored, and may feel that their relationship is at fault. In truth, it is not the relationship, but the need for everything to be "just so" at the office that puts work in the top priority slot.
The spouse may also feel uncomfortable whenever the two of them go out with friends, or even have a discussion with neighbors. The person with OCPD may come across as gruff, unsympathetic, or obstinate, which can make the spouse feel guilty and disappointed in their identity as a couple. The spouse also may look down on the person with OCPD for displaying frugality and being overly stringent, both with him or herself and with others (such as children). The OCPD may preclude any flexibility in schedule, which can affect vacation plans as well as daily changes in schedule.
In addition, the person with OCPD may rely heavily on strict moral codes, which can strongly affect a marriage. The spouse may be turned off by any self-righteousness about "the way things should be done," and can feel judged for every action that is 'not up to par'.